Silence on asking a question can mean many things - one that the question was not clear and the less obvious one is that question was surprising. When asked to define what they understood by the term "meeting culture" - 15 people across sectors, timezones and ages who had gathered to unpack this topic - fell silent...until..one of them said... "let me give it a shot - it is a combination of behaviours, practices, values around meetings in a group".. others chimed in.. "its the ethos of the group...the choice of tone and language".... after 90 minutes of a spirited dialogue it was realised that while meetings are such a pervasive part of our groups, we very seldom pause and reflect on the "meeting culture" that we are ending up with or that we want to nourish.
This article that provides an interesting meeting culture framework says "Meetings bring culture to life, amplifying both the positives and negatives within an organization......Meetings provide a realistic picture of how your team members relate to each other. They shed light on how your organization operates when it comes to power, decision-making, communication, and collaboration....."
Our current meeting culture
I began the peer circle inviting people to bring an object that to them represents the meeting culture in their group. A variety of objects came that gave a peak into both the life nurturing and life depleting experiences in meetings.
Life nurturing
White paper (openness to learning/ acceptance; safe space authentic connections)
Book/ readings (socratic - equal set up; planned/ structured/ prep meeting)
Wedding ring (collaborative meetings)
Life depleting
Heart painting/ book Fearless freedom (opposite of this in culture)
Stress ball (ball rolling)
Bottle (bottled up emotions)
Zip (struggle to give critical feedback)
Airplane (rushed)
Jumbled up wires (go everywhere)
Unicorn (unrealistic)
Pen (controlling/ dangerous place)
You can see which list was longer! We ran a few polls to further understand's experiences in meetings. On a poll about effectiveness (achieving goal/ purpose of meeting); efficiency (in the right time); engagement (involvement in meetings), the group’s responses were mixed. While engagement was seen on a higher side across, effectiveness and efficiency received more spread out ratings from 1-5.
On a poll on which aspect of the person was engaged in meetings, the obvious result was the mind. When one person shared that "my heart races, my fingers clench, my hands sweat"...it struck me how quickly our body reacts to our external experiences. One person shared that when we talk about vision/ passion/ interests, the spirit is tapped.
On asked whether we can engage the whole person consistently across all meetings, one person shared that they are all engaged in some way whether we like it or not...If one has to engage them with intention - the group felt that it may not be possible or desired in EVERY meeting, however, engaging the whole person consistently across different types of meetings in the organisation builds trust.
People also shared that we tend to be more deliberate about meetings we do with external stakeholders and that much more less for meetings we conduct internally - as if we are on some sort of auto pilot.
What influences meeting culture?
People strongly felt that the overall organisation culture has a big influence on meeting cultures. One of the participants shared their group's experience - "The value of inclusion is practiced by making space/ giving time for people to share especially those who may need some more time to articulate and share. Also the leader shares after everyone has shared."
Past experiences, participants and the facilitator himself/ herself also have big influences on the meeting culture of a group. I have noticed this many times whether new people in an organisation continue to operate on assumptions about meeting etiquette from their previous work spaces - and since there is no "deliberate conversation" around meeting cultures - the behaviours are noticed but not explored or re-oriented in light of what is the "expected" etiquette in the current work space. (for e.g. coming from less engaging meeting cultures - people may experience "freedom shock" when they come to a space where there is higher engagement and inclusion.)
What are parameters of a "healthy meeting culture"?
Work on the task
Good track of time/ keeping to agenda
Everyone is heard
Collaboration
Helping everyone follow along
Reactions to meetings - people look forward to participate in the meeting and regret it if they miss the meeting/ Fear of Missing Out/ people come to meetings even if they are optional!
How much of the agenda gets driven by the group
Keeping everyone in the loop especially for those who missed it, so one doesn't repeat everything in the follow-up meetings.
If meeting with external persons, then at the end deliver some souvenir, publications or any other give away so he will remember on return too.
People speak passionately and openly take responsibility for specific actions
Before the meeting - People look forward to it. During the meeting - Don't know how time flies . After the meeting - People feel good about it.